My husband and I are now four years into this beautiful journey of parenthood. Though there are many tired days and toddler tantrums, I wouldn’t trade full time motherhood for anything. As the boys get older, I look back to my childhood for things I want to teach them and experiences I want us to have together. However, there is one huge difference between the world my mother parented in and the one I face today: technology! I am a millennial and came of age just as smart phones were being introduced into everyday life. What my childhood looked like: calling a landline to talk to my friends (speaking to their parents first!), printing out Mapquest directions, and sleepovers to watch the latest release on VHS. In high school, I used a shared family flip phone and I went off to college with a Razor phone in my pocket. The biggest distractions my friends and I had was choosing which ringtone to download.
Contrast that world with the one kids face today: a super computer in nearly every person’s pocket. Endless gaming, information, and social media at our fingertips. In the US 70% of kids have their own smartphone by age 12. Another shocking statistic from Jonathan Haidt, author of the book Anxious Generation, is that 40% of 2 year olds have a tablet. We have totally changed from a play-based childhood to a screen-based childhood. And how has that change affected our kids? The statistics show that it has made them lonelier with greater mental and behavioral health issues. Anxiety, depression, and suicide rates among young people have skyrocketed since 2014. Mr. Haidt calls this change the “Great Rewiring.”
While we often talk about the mental health epidemic and the significant behavioral issues in schools, we rarely talk about the common denominator: our children’s brains have grown around their phones. Apps are designed to keep kids hooked with dopamine rewards that real life cannot replicate. When a device is taken away,they experience physical withdrawal symptoms and emotional turmoil.
We all need to do some self reflection and think about the role of technology in the lives of our children, grandchildren and our lives. Do we know how often screens are used at their daycares and schools? Do we default to digital learning programs over pencil and paper? Do our kids talk more to their friends through devices than face to face? Personally, when I stopped using a personal Facebook account my anxiety decreased significantly. I no longer knew what was happening in everyone’s lives at all times. Instead, I had a reason to give an old friend a phone call and truly connect.
I’m not saying that we should let our kids have no technology. I must admit that there are times that my boys watch TV so I can focus on putting a meal together, but I am determined that their lives will not center around technology. Some days that means we have to go for a car ride and look at construction sites because I’ve hit my limit and desperately want to use technology as a babysitter. I’m also thankful to know there are other moms striving to give their kids a play-based childhood. But it’s not something that we can do alone. We need to take collective action and form our own communities sharing the same values. You can find more information at Smartphonefreechildhoodus.com. The website suggests the following standards: 1. No smartphones before high school, 2. No social media before 16, 3. No phones in schools, 4. More independence and free play in the real world. Phone in schools has been a hot topic lately and we will dive more into that issue in a future column. We hope this information starts a greater conversation about childhood.
Rep. Bethany Soye with
Rep. Tesa Schwans &
Sen. Joy Hohn
